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嗯嗯嗯
最近呢...
在经济上有一点超支了
花了很多很多
一个礼拜去了怡宝四次！！！
我的天啊！
这是最放肆的一次
可能是乐乐不在 不管我们了 呵呵

第一个星期六
跟了我最珍惜的housemate+friends坐巴士去怡保解解买东西的瘾
哈哈 这一趟花了好多 但确找回了我们以前的感觉 也买了好多东西呀
我无比珍惜你们
那天  我的第一次Kenny Roger Roester <3

You are the Apple of My Eye
This is Monday
With Feng Kalao Meesem Cecelia
The 1st time I watch it...
The feeling is touch with funny...haha...
我们终于等到这部戏的上映
这感觉  太棒了
加上又去血拼了一番
不用说  这次失血更多= =
但...
我无比满足
那天  “那些年”

那天  我的第一次Secret Recipet

星期三
感谢阿芬肯带我和他的朋友又一次去怡保看电影
（虽然星期四我是由考试的）
这次是晚上十一点的电影  也是最后一天上映了
"In Time"
这部戏教会我们要珍惜时间
Time's up, People die.!
哈哈  就让我们好好把握时间  珍惜宝贵的时间吧
时间它 真的不等人
我无比相信
那天  我真的疯了

又一个星期六
又和你们这几个我珍惜的+Kalao Along
我的第二次 "那些年"
这次的感觉是更好笑 更了解 更有感受
但是最好的还是  是跟你们一起
这次没买很多
只买了一件 五十零吉 的Mango T-shirt
我没有心疼  我爱它
至少它是有牌 有quality的
哈哈
我无比高兴
(只是回来时和阿芬吵了一架
  我讨厌吵架 把我弄得很郁闷)

那天 我的第一次Black Canyon

Last but not least,
星期五 终于 等到你们的约
真得很开心
等了好久
我们一起yumcha了
这些人   虽然少联络
但是我很珍惜你们  珍惜我们一起的时间
我很想和你们好好的
甚至更熟 更好
呵呵
希望很快又有下一次

那几天
我放肆
我挥霍
但是我...
却很开心...!!!

You are the Apple of My eye

很好的一部电影
看了  也学了很多
从中领悟了一些些
为了未来  我们得奋斗
不能再净做一些没意义的事了
每个人的人生都不一样
沈佳宜很勇敢很努力
柯景藤也很努力 很专一
虽然两个人到最后没能在一起
但是这样的结局却没有让我觉得遗憾
用真心去祝福自己所爱的人
这是更伟大 更勇敢 更值得敬佩的事
有时候暧昧比朋友关系还复杂 比恋人关系还单纯
这样不好吗？
这样很好 淡淡的 甜甜的 不会有分手 也不会有一起

虽然是错过了很多
但是人生就是这样
不会没有错过 不会没有遗憾
错过了又怎样 可以重来吗？
不行吧
只有继续前进 努力把握 努力的去勇敢
努力的去珍惜 努力的去学习
遗憾是会有的 学习看待 就不这么难受了
柯藤就是这样

每个人的中学生涯都不一样
有沈佳宜 有柯藤 有不同的恋爱
有一点点遗憾我的中学生涯没有这么伟大的恋爱发生
但也有那么一点点的庆幸
我的中学生涯是与众不同的
你有你的故事
我有我的故事
你的故事完美
我的故事也不差
人生嘛  要是一样了不就没意义了吗

在平行时空里
沈佳宜和柯景藤是很相爱的在一起
有时候现实不允许的东西
还是会发生的
因为时间

因为爱

Impact of Greedy

Damn it!
What the hell of my life and the fuck mood I have now!
Althought it's a nice sister's talk tonight, but unconsciously touch my wound...in heart...
It's hurt!

A deep and difficult problem is waiting for me, waiting me to resolve it.
What should I do?
Yes, just ignore it!
No work if I care about it.
Just waste my time and my mood!

After so many things, it's time for me to learn about IGNORE. Everyone have their close friends, best friends even acquaintance friends, I owned it also, but I envy the others who own more than me. I'm too greedy, it's enough for me and just my stubborn shit thinking don't let me leave the devil place! What a shame I lose the contact with my ex-school friends. I very very appreciate it and always try my hard to protect everything I have but all gone just like what I imagine, I predict. Who cause this? It's me!
I really appreaciate each friends I meet. It;s not different for each other.
I recpect the lossing I faced too.

Open my thinking, treat all as easy, satisfy for all!
What a worthless me owns these all is a great present from GOD.
Appreciate everything. Don't ever greedy for more!

I want my bright smile stay in my face forever!

Learn about life, thank about what I own...

Damn Emotions

这么久了
我都控制得很好很好
我也坚持了很久很久
到最后
还是忍不住
还是这样
一直看一直想一直发懵
多希望重新来过

不一样的东西
我也一样坚持努力了很久
努力管好自己的心情 自己的感受
还是会难过
虽然一切都在慢慢好转...

靠的人始终只有自己！

Dream make me love you!

Ohssss...
I saw you!
But not in reality, is ia my dream.
You are nothing special before the "dream", just a normal passenger in my life.
But after the dream, something changed, something different, and something special.
The feel that I get is warm, comfortable, you make me don't feel like to wake up.
I missing you!

I know it is just a dream, is not real, but it is enough for me.
Like I say before, I want to get something always is more difficult than others.
Life is a dream, dream is our life.
I satisfled.
At least I got dreamed something about you.

The dream make me happy whole day.
I hope tonight I can have a dream about you again.
Thank you so much.
-You-will become my backbone the whole week.
Just one week, I will get back my freedom.
I love you this week...!!!

Shopping controlled me!

Omg!!!
What is in my mind actually?
I come here, working here, bear everything here, at first the reason is for my studies...
But recently I found that my view changed or can say is I out controlled.
Haha...


Next,
I wanted to share my result about my shopping in Singapore.
Hehe...


First day, I shopping in Yishun, I buy
1) A lot of hair, face accessories...useful...
2) 2 similar cloths from Cotton On-the cloths need to wear with tube, is super comfortable because made by cotton...


Second day, I shopping in Woodland and Bishan, I buy
1) 2 similar short pants from Cotton On too-I like it so much because it's a pants made of cotton too, super comfortable when wear...
2) 1 antique necklace-omg! It is worth mentioning, this is what I bought the most expensive necklace in this life...But it is worth...I just can say that I love it so much...Woohoo...
I love antique!

Next week,
Third day,I shopping in Ang Mo Kio, I buy
1) First is a pair of shoe, I buy-is a shoe with great personality, blue with grey color, a costly shoe...
2) 3 vest 1 tube-omg! I started to regret it...but I like it too...haha...
3) another shoe with flesh color-This is a proper shoe, cheaper than the 1st shoe...
This is my first time to buy 2 shoes in a day! Can't let ah fen know or she will kill me soon...haha...


Finally, the expression is I spend a lot of money here.
I waste my studies fee.
I wanted to postpone my studies again.
Originally, I am a women who will spend a lot of money.
I think is nobody accompany me shopping then cause me spend too much already.
(trying to put responsible to others)
haha...
I am out controlled!


Now I just worry that how my studies? How my future?
What I am thinking?
Oh My God!


SUCK!!!

Survive

It's true.
People would change with the environment.
I changed.
I found that I already look like other than myself.
My face, my mind, my attitude, my personality and....all changed...
I can say that I become mature and different.
Yes! I can feel that you know.
I found the real me, but this is not a good thing, I can change my character easily when I was faced with different people.
It's cruel to me.
I try to maintain all of these but I can't.
Oh My Goodness!!!
Even so, I decided to keep this character.
I don't want perfect.
The perfect person need to bear the great pressure, but I don't care.
Perhaps this is the condition that can't eat grapes then says that the grapes is sour, but...
Maybe this is true also.
SIMPLE is my aim!
haha...
Anyway, I don't want to try again, this is cruel and torment.
Like the decision that I made to give up my studies and go to social work.
Haiz...
Because of this decision, I lost a lot of thing that belong to me before it.

By the way, I learned.
I learned how to bear...anythings that can bear or can't bear, I bear all of it lastly!
I got my lessons.

Only one thing that I can't learn more is the skill of communication.
I try my best but still can't reach the top.
Please give me some times.
I want success without any help, just my effort.

Useless

已经一个月多了
为什么还是这样不习惯
还是那么拘谨 胆小 怕事 放不开
明明是一家人 明明人家对我好好的
为什么我那么的没用
什么都不敢
不管小事大事都不敢
很严重的觉得自己无能
I'm useless!!!

新工作
我却怕东怕西 忘东忘西的
达不到别人对我的期望
我好没用
什么都做不好
出来做事了我才知道我是那么的糊涂
那么的大神经
一点小事都做不好
我就那么的差劲吗
做错了我只能借着天黑 在路上偷流泪
借着人多 在mrt流泪
谁知道

很想很想回到一年前
那个十八岁 不怕事 不知天高地厚
有一大堆好朋友的我
跟你们在一起真的很快乐
来这里一个月
我也忍了一个月
也不曾真真正正的笑过
我真的很不喜欢做工
我压力大到已经不知道什么是压力了
我难过到已经不知道什么是眼泪了
我伪装到已经不知道我是谁了
我想哭到眼泪已经不流了
我想你们想到我心痛死了
我后悔到我已经没感觉了

有一次放工回家时
我看到了家乐的背影
我以为我在金宝了
我真的以为
我差点就开口喊他了
那个时候我开心了一秒钟
我笑了
但过后却失望了一整天
我哭了
我很想回金宝
真的好想

知道你们很开心的在过生活
祝福你们

我也祝福我自己
能再忍三个月
只要三个月就好了
我就能读书了
有谁知道现在的我多么的想读书
想回校园
想跟朋友一起
但是人事已非
没朋友了
每个人都忘了我
很失望的说

我要得其实不多
却比任何人都难得到
原来一切就是这样
不公平
我连反抗的勇气也没有
我输

Cry

I cry...without reason...
I smile...without reason...
I cry...with a lot of reason...
I smile...with a lot of reason...

Why I cry?
Today...I'm crazy...
Look the photo, alone in home, sit in front of notebook, in tears...
The photo run out 1 by 1, again, I know I don't bear it, but I can't stop it...my tears...
Anyway...Who care?




I miss U.

我们都怕痛...尤其是心痛...

真的好痛好痛
我的心...
我受不了那么崎岖那么多变化的生活

和家人在新山生活了两个星期
一家团聚的日子真的让我感觉很幸福很温馨
爸爸妈妈姐姐妹妹和赫赫一起出门 一起在家看电视 一起吃饭
听妈妈抱怨  看他们两老吵架 一起聊天
这些只是那么小小的愿望都好难实现
不是姐姐不在就是我们不在
一年这样的生活又有多少次呢
又离开你们几天
我就好像失心疯般
不能控制的一直想哭
鼻子酸得要命
心疼得要死
我真的真的很想就这样呆在你们的身边一辈子
自私的要你们照顾我一辈子
让我无忧无虑
我可以吗？

虽然只有两天在麻坡和朋友们相处
但是谢谢你们还肯和我们出来
一直以来 其实我都认为我人缘不好 朋友少
很开心你们对我不离不弃的
只要有你们几个我就很开心了
我不需要拉下我的脸去和其他人攀关系
我只想和珍惜我了解我不讨厌我的你们在一起
你们...
让我真得很舍不得
很难过
难过到我的心痛得半命

回到金宝
我真的好怕
我了解阿芬之前是怎样一个人呆在这里的了
真的很恐怖很恐怖
这让我的心更想哭呀
怎么办？

那么崎岖那么难过那么幸苦
日子还是要过啊
妈妈说得对
不能抱怨什么
谁叫我要出生在这个家
我对这个家有责任
每个人都不一样
别人比我好
我不能妒嫉
因为还有很多人比我更加可怜呢
这是我的命呀
学习认命   然后努力改变命运

姐姐也说得对
我们四姐妹要为了我们自己和家人努力
不能靠别人求别人
黄家四姐妹可以输人 就是不能输给自己
要有志气
所以我既然作了决定  放弃了  就不能后悔
我没怪任何人
姐，我真的不怪你...
你没害我  反而帮了我很多
谢谢你

我知道错过你们，我就只剩一个人了...我会回来的，但是我知道你们会忘记我的...我知道我人缘不好，我不求什么，我也不需要表面的朋友 ，我只需要慢慢安抚我失去的，然后走我自己的路，没有你们的路，我会努力让它比你们还要精彩，虽然是一个人，但是我不介意，一个人也可以很好的。。。